Hace 81 años

Hoy habria cumplido 81 años. El cancer de higado del coño se lo llevo mas rapido de lo que pudimos siquiera prepararnos.

Cada dia lo extraño… lo echo mucho de menos y quisiera que estuviera aqui. Se que es un pensamiento egoista, pero asi lo siento.

Era un gran hombre y alguien a quien debo muchisimo de lo que soy hoy en dia (con mis cosas buenas y mis cosas por mejorar, como con todo).

Siempre estaras en mi pensamiento, papa. Te quiero…

4 years…

Time flies.
It almost seem like yesterday
That he left us.

We didn’t even know what was up
He kept scratching and itching
And complaining,
Something he never used to do.
Something was up,
But we didn’t even know…
what was up.

Until the doctors said CANCER,
The dreaded “C” word
That my mom had defeated
A few years before,
So she thought he could do it too.

But only days passed
And it was obvious he was in pain.

Within days,
He stopped laughing and joking
He stopped talking…
He closed his eyes,
Those beautiful eyes full of hope
And love for everyone.

January 16, 2005
My dad left this world.
He died of liver cancer.

He was the man I hope I can get to be one day.
He was my biggest inspiration.

Te extraño papa…

He would have turned 80 today

Today is August 1. Every year today meant we’d celebrate as it was my dad’s birthday.

It’s been 3 and a half years since he left us. Today he would have turned 80 if he were around. Liver cancer took him from us before we could even realize what was going on.

I believe he is in a better place and from there he is watching over us as loving a full of peace as he always was while he was alive.

We miss you, viejo… Te echamos de menos…

The Last Lecture: a great read!

The Last Lecture” is largely based off the video by the same name that you can catch on YouTube and many other websites. However, that is only part of the story.

The book (a few hours to read), unlike the video (under an hour in duration), lets you become one with Randy and his process of preparation for what appears as a certain death as he goes from diagnosis, through treatment and determination to accept his fate of being a pancreatic cancer patient.

My dad died of liver cancer, so Randy’s story resonated very strongly with me. However, my dad did not have the chance to prepare himself (or his family) for his passing. Randy has chosen to live the rest of his life on earth preparing things so that his young children will know what his dad was like… this is a father who loves his kids, no doubt.

Instead of rolling on the bed or complaining about his fate, he embraces it fully (with humor, often) and gets as much out of him as he can, so that his children will have a vast testimonial from which to learn, even though his father won’t be around.

As he paves the road for their future, we benefit from his effort and, if we open up enough, we are bound to learn from Randy like we learned from Morrie in the now-classic “Tuesdays With Morrie.”

Notas del Hospital…

Han pasado 3 años y un dia desde que tome estas notas en mi telefono en el hospital, cuando faltaban pocas horas para que nos dejara.

Decidi compartirlas hoy para sacarlas del baul virtual en que las meti desde entonces…

—-
15 de Enero: Papa desmejoro. Se altera mucho y se rasca mucho todo el tiempo. Su pulso a las 2 pm era +/- 100. Mi mama dice que lo normal en el es 60.

4:15 pm: su presion es 142/73 y su pulso es 130 [sigue subiendo].

16 de Enero: no responde mucho.
6 am: Le siguen dando decadron (esteroide), adavan (para la agustia) y metadone (narcotico?), su pulso es de 130+

7:45 am: presion, 123/62; pulso, 127 bpm

9:10 am: no responde ya, cuando le hablamos.

10:55 am: 83/57 108 bpm…
—–

Nunca termine de tomar las notas. La angustia que producia el ver los valores de pulso subir (con la edad el puso baja), imaginando que en el algun momento va tan rapido que el corazon hace “flat-line”…

Fueron dias terribles pero aun mas terribles fueron para el. Lo quisimos mucho y lo queremos y respetamos tanto mas hoy.

Hoy tuve puesta su gorra de los Red Sox con la que sale en esta foto. Te quiero y extraño mucho, viejo!

Hace 79 años…

Hoy hubiera cumplido 79 años el viejo. Es increible.

Se fue en Enero del 2005, hace casi 2 años y 7 meses, pero su recuerdo esta mas vivo que nunca.

Papa:
Cuanto quisiera que estuvieras aqui, cuanto quisiera que vivieras para que compartieras con nosotros lo bonito que nos sucede asi como lo no tan bonito. Te echamos mucho de menos y pensamos en ti todos los dias.

Santiago esta TAN grande que parece un niño. Nos da conciertos con la guitarra (a su manera, claro esta). Es un verdadero sol y siempre recuerda “El Abuelo del Cielo”. Y los niños nunca mienten: todos sabemos que estas alla arriba.

Andreina esta pintando obras tan lindas que seguro las disfrutarias mucho si las vieras.

Mama esta en proceso de mudarse. Los años le pegan, pero ella sigue echando para adelante y echandote de menos tambien.

En estos dias, Barry Bonds parece que va a batir el record de home runs de Hank Aaron. Aunque este teñido de controversia, estoy seguro que te hubiera gustado disfrutar del momento, cuando ocurra. Seguramente lo haras, desde donde estas.

Se te quiere mucho… te dedicamos nuestra labor, viejo!

Turning 35 and Not Freaking Out

Sunday, I will turn 35. Since I am going to be out of town starting tomorrow, I may not be able to post something, so…

Today I received a musical birthday card from everyone at the office (playing Santana’s “Oye Como Va!”) and I realized that I am not freaking out about this birthday the way I did when I turned 25 or 30 (somehow those “round number” birthdays did that to me).

Life is good. In spite of the diabetes, I keep myself healthy. I have a great family. I have great friends and colleagues. I have met some of the most incredible and inspiring people in the course of the past two months through the TuD community… I mean, who can ask for more?

God, Life:
Thank you!

Dad:
I miss you, but you continue to inspire me every day of my life. This birthday’s for you!